caught in the vector of spoils/boring as bat dung

Initially, I was interested by the function Big Brother performed - it is a global media event in which so many countries and so many people participate - I was interested in the type of sense we might make of ourselves in this latest representation of 'reality'. There is also the on going feedback loop between viewer and BB housemate. Lines appear blurred - are the housemates characters, actors, real people, celebrities? Are the viewers participants? To what extent does BB shape 'reality'? The show makes a pretense towards social experiment, initially it promised (did it?) to show human behaviour as it 'really' is or 'really' could be. It appears interactive - we as viewers seem to be able to influence outcomes. But so what? What does it mean?

Once upon a previous season, my flatmates and I were participating, by voting, gazing, talking, we were part of a national media vector linked into the BB house in our own house. During eviction night, with the TV on, we watched the Housemates on their couch, gazing at Gretel in the box on the wall, their actions were mirroring our actions. We were all connected and just as they were shaping our lives we were shaping theirs (we could kick them out and they could determine our conversation patterns and personal interactions). Part of the reason we watched with such dedication was that it had wider implications to our everyday lives. If we weren't switched on we weren't switched on. It wasn't 'just' a matter of wondering 'does BB reflect reality or create it?' but rather the intrigue of watching it become embedded in our consciousness', watching it become culture, watching ourselves watching. It doesn't matter if you like BB or not, think it's good or crap, the fact is if you're not watching you have no idea what's going on in 'the world' - you can't participate in 'real' life conversations that involve this show.

As i write this, my new flatmate Matt has switched the TV over to BB and Perri is showering in a bikini and stilettos. Jamie is crying again and Camilla is saying "it was so surreal.." and Claire is saying "I feel like they're dead" (John and Ashley have just been evicted for 'sexual misconduct' whereby Ashley slapped Camilla in the face with his penis while John held her down). And now the three of us Petie, Matt and I are berating them, laughing and agreeing with each other's degrading comments towards these social lepers who, ironically, have lost none of our interest. The camera is positioned behind Perri, we can see right up her sarong and I really don't want to, but I can't stop staring. I really want to leave the room but I can't. If I removed myself from the room I would be removing myself from the conversation, from the interactions with my flatmates that occur around the program. I would also be excluded from conjecture outside my house - in the 'real' world. So, I haven't stopped writing about BB and I haven't stopped talking about it and I keep watching it even though I don't like it or rather i don't like my consumption of it. So what do you do?